It’s Daylight Robbery!
Tuesday, 08 March 2011
It’s Daylight Robbery!
You have heard the term ‘it’s daylight robbery’ but where does it come from? I will explain! You may remember the dreamless ones are stupid because they are genetically descended from Neanderthals and they keep altering the clocks trying to save ‘daylight’. Anyway, way back in 1696 the King of England introduced a window tax. This was a very fair tax. (more…)
Wednesday, 03 November 2010.
I’m still winning at Farmville, my friend’s internet went down and she had all her crops wither, she was helping with a co-op. No worries, I shall finish that later. Most of the grapes needed to finish it are on over 90% so I will finish soon.
There used to be a car park at the back of the local park and the dreamless ones closed it. I have to park in a side street now at the front.
It was a sunny day and I parked my car and opening the back door I took my camera out of the case and put the strap around my neck. I thought I could take a picture of the gatehouse, trees and maybe the squirrels. The sun was shining and the trees cast shadows as I walked into the park and I could see the Victorian bandstand; but I already had photographs of that. The path is lined with park benches, which is handy, I like to sit down and steady the camera. I get tired walking around these parks too. I approached the bandstand and then I saw her, she was a vision of beauty and sitting on a park bench. She had long flowing hair and was perfectly groomed. Her tight white shirt looked like it was freshly ironed. She looked so cool dressed all in white, like a virtual angel. Her skirt was rather short, revealing long slender legs that seemed to go all the way up to her armpits. She looked at me and smiled. I thought, I wonder if she would pose for a photograph. I couldn’t take my eyes off her and it seemed mutual as she just stared at me with those hypnotic blue eyes. She crossed her legs and that short skirt rided up another inch revealing even more of those perfect legs. Her hand went to the button on her shirt and she started to unbutton her shirt! I watched intently as she revealed her ample and firm breasts; they appeared to be trying to escape her almost see through white lacy bra. I couldn’t believe my eyes! She kept on slowly undoing the buttons until they were all undone and stood up facing me. The white shirt fell to the ground! I seemed to be the only one looking at her, everyone else seemed really uninterested. Then her hands slid lower and she started to undo the fastener on that very short skirt, it dropped to the ground revealing her lacy, almost see through panties. My pulse rate quickened as I witnessed this and she continued to smile at me. She turned away from me and seemed to be looking at something on the other side of the park. Her hands went behind her back and she undid the straps on her bra they seemed to snap open revealing the perfect unblemished skin on her back. The bra dropped to the ground! I glanced around and still no one was paying attention except me! My heart pounded as I saw her hands go down to those almost see through panties and her thumbs went in each side of them. What was she going to do? She started to turn back to face me… Then there was a loud crash and I felt this stabbing pain in the back of my head. I opened my eyes it was all black…
Don’t you hate that! :) You’re having a great dream and you suddenly wake up! It could be worse; I could be a dreamless one… :)
I think I shall do some Internet shopping later. I want a yellow thing, with a built in battery, air compressor and light just in case my car gets a flat battery; or a flat tyre for that matter. I am going to consider a solar panel too, to charge the battery. That could be awkward to fit, the cigar lighter is only connected when the ignition is on and I want to plug it in there. It would stop the battery going flat. I’ll ask them to alter the wiring on the cigar lighter when it goes in the garage; they have to fix the reversing lights anyway. I am considering a graphics tablet; I have no idea what programs they work with; but I could draw on my computer screen and sign documents! It would be cool if it works. I could do virtual book signings online when my novel is published! I don’t think anyone has done that before, I am such an innovator. I did some Tweeting on Twitter yesterday and Tweeted the URL of my blog. I don’t know if I’ll post this to my blog or just guest blog it?
I am thinking of serialising my novel, probably ‘Abduction’ I need to finish it and come up with a new name! I could call it the ‘Stockholm Abduction’ or something. Becky is being held and is shackled to a wall much of the time by a ‘pervert’. She is subjected to psychological abuse and has become more and more desperate and psychologically unstable. He is holding her in Reservoir Street; she doesn’t know that, but his house if right opposite the sex shop. I could call it the ‘Reservoir Street Abduction’. I’ll think of something…
I’m trying to get my mind off the memory enhanced dreamless ones. They appear to be every where. In politics, in HR departments and there are even doctors that are memory enhanced dreamless ones… I thought this morning, elephants never forget, perhaps the Neanderthals mated with the woolly mammoth? Nah, they weren’t tall enough…
Please comment if you like this… :)
I wrote this as a guest blog, but I like it and so I will post it here as a warning to everyone!
Be afraid, be very afraid…
Halloween has come and gone and yet things get spookier. Yesterday, Shari said I was a genius and today I make an amazing, earth shattering discovery. If I can explain this to the world I could win the Nobel Prize. I’ll make a start I’ll try to explain my discovery to you; both of you…
We will begin with my recent thoughts on the dreamless, this stuff is scary, be warned. If you are a regular reader you will know there are predators and prey. Predators can sleep deeply, and go into REM sleep (rapid eye movement) when their minds work quickly and they dream. We are the dreamers and I’m not the only one… Then there are people that in a more primitive era were the prey, these are genetically linked to the Neanderthals. It was quite simple, or so I thought. It is really more complex than I thought and far more scary. Be afraid; be very afraid – the dreamless ones are not to be trusted… The dreamless ones are stupid…
I was reading long articles by a woman who writes about a mathematician and about science. She cannot be dreamless can she? It is impossible? I analysed her writing, there were lots of long words and some of them I had never read before. I looked them up and some didn’t even exist – spooky. I analysed sentences and made an interesting discovery – they were dreamless! They made no sense! I know; it’s hard to believe but true! I read a few articles on finance and they are dreamless and the writer is a millionaire. I know, dreamless millionaires; what next? It gets worse. I was reading fiction and I was suspicious, was this author a dreamless one? How do they do it? I thought perhaps I was getting obsessed, just because her initials were HR doesn’t mean she is a dreamless one… I looked at her online profile… just because she has worked for years in HR and her initials are HR doesn’t mean she is a dreamless one… This doesn’t bear thinking about and so yesterday I made a decision. I was not going to think about the dreamless ones any more, cast them from my mind. I wrote my blog as usual, read it; I didn’t use the word dreamless once!
I finished my blog, you may remember I had a cough. Did I mention I had a cough? It seems better, but my back hurts. I’m still coughing a little. I checked out a website, Shari told me about and some cleansing things. I searched the site for the ingredients of this cleansing things, I couldn’t find the page. My mind started to wander, is this site run by dreamless ones? The dreamless ones were everywhere. I updated my friend’s website and tried not to read anything in case it was written by these freaky dreamless ones… This was getting way too spooky.
My Chinese student friends came online and needed help with their homework. The smart one I helped with her grammar and kept switching between the two of them and then my friend in California came online and was chatting to me as well. The smart student was no problem really, I just helped with her grammar and research then she did send me the next assignment – now it gets spooky! I read a little of the next question – this looked difficult. I was sent the assignment of the not quite so smart student. It was midnight in China and so she left me to edit it and went to bed; the smart student stayed up another hour and a half working on her assignment herself. I worked on the other one for over 2 hours. I now get disturbed… Does this assignment make no sense because of her poor English or is she a dreamless one in disguise? I had to guess and rewrite it and email it back.
I took pills for my cold, cough and chest pains and went to bed. To sleep, perchance to dream…
It was too early to sleep and so after my shower which made me feel much better, it was that or catch pneumonia. I decided to read the question for the next Chinese assignment. It was on leadership and management, no worries; I know about that! Why was it spooky? My friends have to get an A, B, C or a D to pass. I read about getting a D, you would have to be really dreamless to fail this… Spooky… It gets spookier; the question was set by a professor here in England at my local university. Who is this guy? I search the internet. I find a paper written by him and his Emeritus professor – jackpot; all the information we need and we can quote this for the bibliography. No worries, we’re cooking now. I read several thousands of words. It is spooky. There are long words, there are acronyms and many of these have no explanation. It appears to be dreamless… I’m losing it, I’m imagining things.
I then get to the part where I realise they have written a paper about the research others have done and I think I understand one of the acronyms – HRD; could this be the Human Remains Department? I know some of these people! They are dreamless ones! The dreamless ones are writing about leadership and management and re-organising things!
I tried to sleep, I couldn’t; part of me was on Greenwich Mean Time and part of me was still on dreamless time. I finally went to sleep in the early hours of this morning, dreams; I had bloody nightmares. The dreamless ones are taking over! Arggh!
I woke up early, I was on dreamless time and so was my cell phone. It rang to wake me up and hour early. I was too tired, I lay there thinking… What did it all mean? How did dreamless ones become professors at my local university? How do they write and use such long words? How do they remember all those acronyms? How do they get in to politics? How do they take over whole HR departments? How did the dreamless one become a millionaire? Is it possible for dreamless people to achieve all these things? How do they do it?
I had my revelation... It was terrifying. Those two professors, the people in HR, the writer, the finance writer they all had things in common. The use of the acronym HR to start with, long words that made no sense, the over use of acronyms, the dreamless avoidance of ever answering questions. There was only one explanation for this phenomenon. There is a breed of dreamless ones that have photographic memories. They can remember long words, even write them and read them, they have minds full of acronyms and they are taking over. Help!
I’m going to lie down…
There will be more blogs to come and I intend at some point to serialise one of my novels. I need comments and encouragement to write more. I such a reticent writer! :)