OMG! The Bullingdon Boys are in Beijing!
Yes, the Bullingdon Club boys, George Osborne and his mate Boris Johnson have been dispatched to Beijing to get investment for Britain. My apologies for linking the Bullingdon word to the Daily Mail, but like George and Boris I was desperate. The picture is good isn’t it? Notice the big gun on the top of that boat!
The picture has nothing to do with George and Boris, I hasten to add. I didn’t have a big choice of pictures to use without breaching someone’s copyright., so that one had to do. Anyway, it seems we are desperate for investment in Britain and so they are over there chatting to market stall holders and generally meeting people. Not the higher up members of the Communist Party though. One doesn’t mix with those sorts, does one?
Apparently, George will promise to make getting a visa easier for Chinese tourists and students wanting to come to the UK. Does that mean we’ll stop ripping them off George? That’s not very Tory-like. It costs over £200 for a visa for an international student and it’s so complex they have to go through an approved agency. That increases the cost to over £800 and after a year they have to do it all over again so they can study in the UK for another year. A bachelor’s degree is good enough for most British students, but Chinese students tend to think they need at least a Masters. Maybe George should have fixed that before he went to China, not after. Promises, promises, they don’t cut that much ice when they come from politicians like George.
Here in West Midlands we export more to China than any other region of the UK. We also welcome Chinese international students to our universities. I had Chinese students as my guests on Christmas Day last year. It’s amazing, but some people think it’s hard to do business with China, because amongst other things they all speak Chinese. They would wouldn’t they? If you look around Wolverhampton University you’ll find lots of students who speak Chinese and many other languages, who might be able to help. The student who took today’s photo needed a part-time job last year and couldn’t find one. She’s back in Wolverhampton this year doing a Masters degree in International Business.. She might need a part-time job again and maybe even full time during breaks in study. Anyone interested? She might even do a SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats) analysis on your company for you!
George and Boris could ask some questions, while they are in China. Why do they have their own social media in China, like QQ.com instead of using Facebook and Twitter? Why do they have their own search engines? Why not rely on tax avoiding American companies, like the UK? Why are the Chinese trying to limit their population when it’s such a massive country? Why not pack people in, like in the UK and build more and more roads and high speed rail lines? Why aren’t the Chinese allowed to watch American porn on the internet, like Boris can? Why are the Chinese making their own Iphone? What’s wrong with Apple?
I was talking to a Chinese student the other day, using Skype. That’s Voice Over Internet Protocol telecommunications, for the benefit of any local Tories that might be visiting today. Anyway, she was translating an article from the Economist into Chinese, as you do… Those articles are more or less in code, they use so many metaphors. They use a lot of weather references like headwinds, going south and words like liquidity. This time they were talking about the American government shut down and used the term get stuffed, which for the economist, was going south. It wasn’t easy to explain the etymology of the phrase. But at least now the Chinese know exactly what to say to George and Boris….
What do you think? Please share you thoughts in the comments box. You can also follow me on Twitter to get updates. Did you know you can do voice tweets on the Chinese version of Twitter? Imagine what we could do with a British version of Twitter. One could send a message and wave one’s union flag at the same bloody time…
- Boris mobbed by students in China – The Independent (independent.co.uk)
- The Boris in China diaries: What’s Chinese for ‘polymorphous’? How the Mayor’s jokes got lost in translation (standard.co.uk)
- Boris Johnson upstages George Osborne on China visit (theguardian.com)
- Unite leader urges ‘fightback’ against Bullingdon Boys (itv.com)
- Boris Johnson: Don’t be afraid of Chinese firms buying into London (standard.co.uk)
- Breaking News: Chinese mob Boris on trade mission (crosbyherald.co.uk)
- Chinese mob Boris on trade mission (standard.co.uk)
- Boris Johnson mobbed by students during trade visit to China (metro.co.uk)
- Boris Johnson urges more Chinese students to study in London (london24.com)
- The Chancellor of the Exchequer and The Mayor of London in China (everoptimisticuk.wordpress.com)